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A short list of things wrong with Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker

12/22/2019

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(MASSIVE SPOILERS, DO NOT READ IF YOU HAVE NOT SEEN THE FILM)

To make it clear, Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker, is not a great film. Hilariously over-packed with fan service, the film itself is an uneven trek through a very unsatisfying end of a saga that deserved more. Closing a wonky loop, we say goodbye to Skywalker and company in this inconsistent and poorly structured film. Below is a list of things that have yet to leave my head since I saw the film several days ago.

- I can not stand the old "ah-gotcha," trope. This happens twice (spoilers ahead) in TRoS. When Daisey Ridley, in a force struggle with Kylo Ren, attempts to save Chewbacca from capture from an Empire ship before losing control and exploding the ship with force lightening. Of course, it's later revealed that he somehow was just in another ship and did not in fact get blown up. What is insane about this scene is how quickly she is forgiven. She kills a staple of the franchise and Poe and Finn are basically giving her a pep talk two scenes later, assuring her it isn't her fault. This of course is her leaning towards the dark side but fool me once, shame on you, full me twice and Abram's has made another terrible Star Wars film. The second is when the planet of Kimiji (where the audience is introduced to Zorii and Babu Frik, the only character that matters) is blow up. Of course, in classic Abram's fashion, its revealed later that they left the planet in time to make it to the final climactic space battle with Palpatine's ship (also, did he just have people in those ships ready at all times?). This is one of the laziest things you can do when it comes to film making. Let's make a bold choice to kill off a beloved character only to bring it back, making all repercussions essentially a waste of time. Now I know, it's a family film, but it does open with a scene of Kylo Ren chopping down numerous random space warriors so obviously Disney is not afraid of violence. 

- Speaking of Kylo Ren, what in God's name was *that* kiss moment? We all laughed at the shirtless Kylo moment but, at what point were we supposed to believe that Rey and Kylo had any attraction at all? I mean, why kiss him? As a "thanks for saving me," after repeatedly trying to kill you and your friends? It was the beginning of the end of the film that felt like a blurry of Abram's saying, "here, you asked for it so have it." Of course, it ultimately means nothing because his body vanishes immediately afterwards. It is even funnier given the fact that they are linked by the force, being the ultimate ying and yang. She is the good Palpatine while Ren is the bad Skywalker. The moment is so tone deaf and ridiculous, it feels like the writers just felt the need to include one major straight kiss to balance out the unmemorable gay one.

- Also, Rey gets a gold light saber for some reason, not making her the second character in Star Wars without a blue, green, or red one. Why? I guess because she is the only Jedi now and this is just the way it is going to be signified.

- Also, what the hell happened to Kylo Ren's students? Where was the force sensitive boy at the end of the last Star Wars film? Whats the point of Finn being force sensitive if he's not going to do anything with it anyway?

- We can't forget about Rose (although no one would fault you if you did). After a character that faced an overwhelming amount of criticism and an actresses that faced real world bullying, it was massively disappointing to see that Disney did next to nothing for either of the two. Rose had, what felt like, equal lines to some of the randomly added resistance fighters, including Dominic Monhagan that you probably know as Charlie from Lost (and of course, LotR). She doesn't even get to leave the resistance base for the film. She's effectively grounded and forgotten about, leaving her legacy as a memorable character in the dust.

- General Hux being the traitor was too obvious but the fact that he helps Finn and the crew only to die immediately after by General Pride was also another disappointing moment. I mean really, Pride just knew right away it was Hux? Understandably, this was meant to make Pride seem a bit more evil and authoritative but none of it mattered because the funniest character on the dark side was now dead. Gleeson's interactions with Kylo Ren in the previous two Star Wars films were a delight and it would have been worthwhile to make him a defector and not another casualty. I guess comedy is a price of war too.

- Also nostalgia much? Harrison Ford, Mark Hamill, Carrie Fisher, voices from various Jedi, allusions and references to famous notable Star Wars events and more, all seem to make an appearance in this film. I get that this is the last in a very long running and beloved franchise but please, make the movie strong enough to stand on its own. It already exist within the SW universe, do we need to be constantly reminded of it too?


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